Daily Archives: July 8, 2011

Sidecars

From Denny Bell, Friend of the Forge

With the price of gas, maybe we should all look into these things.

SIDECAR….WoW…Cool

Who said Sidecars can’t be cool?

http://www.slide.com/r/o79y4_L34T8cc109HDrQxiG-tY7f1191?previous_view=lt_embedded_url

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Can You Help?

From Herb Stepp, Friend of the Forge

Can You Help?

Since September 11, 2001,
Americans have come together as never before in our generation. We have banded together to overcome adversity. We have weathered direct attacks on our own soil, wars overseas, corporate/government scandal, layoffs, unemployment, stock price plunges, droughts, fires, mad cow, SARS, high gasoline prices, and a
myriad of economic and physical disasters both great and small. But now, we
must come together once again to overcome our greatest challenge yet.

Hundreds of professional football players in our very own nation are going to
be locked out, living at well below the seven-figure salary level. And as if that weren’t bad enough, they could be deprived of their life-giving pay for several months, possibly longer, as a result of the upcoming lockout situation.

But you can help!

For only $27,080 a month, about $902.75 a day (that’s less than the cost of a
large screen TV) you can help an NFL player remain economically viable during
his time of need. This contribution by no means solves the problem, as it
barely covers the annual minimum salary; but it’s a start, and every little bit
will help!

Although $900 a day may not seem like a lot of money to you, to a football
player it could mean the difference between spending the lockout golfing in Florida or on aMediterranean cruise. For you, $900 is nothing more than a month’s rent, a mortgage payment, or a month of medical insurance; but to a football player, $900 will partially replace his daily salary.

Your commitment of less than $900 a day will enable a player to buy that home
entertainment center, trade in the year-old Lexus for a new Ferrari, or enjoy a
weekend in Rio.
HOW WILL I KNOW I’M HELPING?

Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the player you
sponsor. Detailed information about his stocks, bonds, 401(k), real estate, and
other investment holdings will be mailed to your home. Plus, upon signing up
for this program, you will receive an unsigned photo of the player lounging
during the lockout on a beach somewhere in the Caribbean (for a signed photo, please include an additional $150). Put the photo on your refrigerator to remind you of other peoples’ suffering.

HOW WILL HE KNOW I’M HELPING?

Your NFL player will be told that he has a SPECIAL FRIEND who just wants to
help in a time of need. Although the player won’t know your name, he will be
able to make collect calls to your home via a special operator in case
additional funds are needed for unforeseen expenses.

Remember: A lifestyle is a horrible thing to waste…
———————————————————————————————–
YES, I WANT TO HELP!
I would like to sponsor a locked out NFL player. My preference is (check
below):
[ ] Offense [ ] Defense [ ] Special Teams [ ] Entire team

Please charge the account listed below $902.75 per day for the duration of the
lockout and send me a picture of the player and my very own Roger Goodell (NFL Commissioner) pin to wear proudly on my hat (include $80 for the hat).

Your Name: ____________________

Telephone Number: ___________________
[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Other
Account Number: __________________

Exp. Date:_______ Security Code:_________
Signature: _____________________________________________
Alternate card (if your primary card exceeds its credit limit):
[ ] MasterCard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Other
Account Number: __________________Exp. Date:_______ Security Code:_________

Signature: _____________________________________________

Book Report

From Rick Bruno, 71C
NO NURSING HOME FOR ME                     !!!!!!!!!
No nursing home for us.  We’ll be checking into a Holiday Inn!

With the average cost for a nursing home care costing $188.00 per day, there is a better way when we get old and too feeble.
I’ve already checked on reservations at the Holiday Inn.  For   a combined long term stay discount and senior discount, it’s $59.23 per night.
Breakfast is included, and some have happy hours in the                     afternoon.  That leaves  $128.77 a day for lunch and dinner in any                     restaurant we want, or room service, laundry, gratuities and                     special TV movies.  Plus, they provide a spa, swimming pool, a workout room, a lounge and washer-dryer, etc.   Most have free toothpaste and razors, and all have free shampoo and soap.
$5 worth of tips a day you’ll have the entire staff scrambling to help you.  They  treat you like a customer, not a                     patient.  There’s  a city bus stop out front, and seniors ride  free.  The  handicap bus will also pick you up (if you fake a decent limp).
To meet other nice people, call a church bus on  Sundays.
For a change of scenery, take the airport shuttle bus and eat at one of the nice restaurants there.
While  you’re at the airport, fly somewhere.  Otherwise, the cash keeps building up.

It  takes months to get into decent nursing homes. Holiday Inn                     will take your reservation today.
And you’re not stuck in one place forever — you can move from Inn to Inn, or even from city to city.
Want to see  Hawaii?  They have Holiday Inn there too.
TV   broken?  Light bulbs need changing?  Need a mattress replaced?  No problem.. They fix  everything,  and apologize for the                     inconvenience.
The  Inn has a night security person and daily room service. The                     maid checks to see if you are ok.  If not, they’ll call an ambulance . . . or the undertaker.
If  you fall and break a hip, Medicare will pay for the hip, and  Holiday Inn will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your  life.   
                       
And  no worries about visits from family. They will always be                     glad to find you, and probably check in for a few days mini-vacation.
The grandkids can use the pool.
                            What more could I ask for?

So,  when I reach that golden age, I’ll face it with a grin.
AIDS                     WARNING!
 
  
To    all of  you approaching 50 or have REACHED 50 and                     past,  this email is especially for   you……
SENIOR  CITIZENS
ARE   THE NATION’S LEADING CARRIERS OF  AIDS!

HEARING  AIDS

BAND AIDS

ROLL   AIDS

WALKING  AIDS 

MEDICAL   AIDS

GOVERNMENT   AIDS

MOST OF   ALL,

MONETARY  AID TO  THEIR KIDS!

Not  forgetting HIV

(Hair is Vanishing)


I’m only sending this to my ‘old’   friends.

I  love to see you smile.